The Devil's Excrement

People argue about whether the opposition should or not participate in the regional elections. I am extremely weary about them. The reason is simple, if the process to gather the petition to recall Hugo Chavez was so open, so controlled, so visible and observed by international organizations and despite this we are in the absurd situation we are in today, what can I expect of a closed process, with machines controlled by the CNE and appeals in the hands of the CNE and the Supreme Court?

The answer is: not very much! In fact, it may become a trap to justify that Chavez is popular, we did not have the signatures and the opposition is a minority.

In fact, I will begin counting the dirty tricks involving the regional elections, which have begun in earnest. Here are the first two:

Trick #1: There will be no election for Governor of Amazonas state.

The pro-Chavez Governor of Amazonas state is asking the CNE to postpone the election for his position. The reason? He initially lost the election and then the Supreme Court voided some of the votes of his opponent. There were new elections and he won. He wants the period to begin from the time that he took over. He is reportedly behind in the polls and has done a terrible job.

Trick #2: Arias Cardenas will run for Governor of Zulia State

Former Chavez co-conspirator in the 1992 coup and Presidential candidate against Chávez in 2001 Francisco Arias Cardenas will run for Governor of Zulia State. The opposition there has a very strong candidate in the current Governor Manuel Rosales and the Chavismo has a very weak one in General Gutierrez. Arias has played a very ambivalent role since April 2002 and has also at times been rumored to be talking to Chavez about becoming Vice-President.  Reportedly, the strategy is not to reveal that Chavez is backing him and split the opposition vote in Arias’ favor. Arias’ own party UNION (what an irony!) of which he is President announced today that they will not back his candidacy.

Will keep counting…

Got this in the mail, could not resist to post, it describes how I feel about justice in Venezuela so well: Justice in Venezuela, it is not blind, it is not impartial, it is not independent…it is Chavista!

(Bottom right corner has a picture of a shark and it says: Squalids attacking)

The People’s ombudsman almost left me speechless when he admitted today that there were excesses and cruel treatment on the part of military personnel during the protests on February 27^th and the first few days of March.

That’s the good news; this guy said something negative about the Government for the first time in five years. It took 86 deaths in protests for him to say something. But then, he continues:

He recognized that there was excessive use of pellets, he criticized hitting people. Kicking them, however, civilians shot at the Guard (??) and one guard was hit by a bullet. He said these were isolated incidents a not a state policy and in Venezuela there is no line of cruel or inhuman treatment.

I see, one guard injured 14 opposition dead, seven missing, 8 tortured, 1750 injured and 450 detained in a few days….there is no pattern here, it is isolated, I hope I am not at the protest when there is one!

The People’s ombudsman almost left me speechless when he admitted today that there were excesses and cruel treatment on the part of military personnel during the protests on February 27^th and the first few days of March.

That’s the good news; this guy said something negative about the Government for the first time in five years. It took 86 deaths in protests for him to say something. But then, he continues:

He recognized that there was excessive use of pellets, he criticized hitting people. Kicking them, however, civilians shot at the Guard (??) and one guard was hit by a bullet. He said these were isolated incidents a not a state policy and in Venezuela there is no line of cruel or inhuman treatment.

I see, one guard injured 14 opposition dead, seven missing, 8 tortured, 1750 injured and 450 detained in a few days….there is no pattern here, it is isolated, I hope I am not at the protest when there is one!

Venezuela’s former Ambassador to the UN in Geneva Victor Rodriguez resigned today in protest over the violation of human rights and the loss of the rule of law in the country.

The Ambassador who had been part of the Foreign Service for thirty years said “we are losing the rule of law; we can not accept the violation and lack of respect for human rights. There is an enormous amount of concern because all fundamental rights are being violated, both civil and political rights of Venezuelans”

Venezuela’s Foreign Minister, immediately denied the resignation of the Ambassador, saying that Dr. Rodriguez is not an Ambassador and devotes himself to breeding cows in his farm in France.

We will keep you updated. By the way, the Foreign Minister did not reply to the charges about human rights violations, cows are more surreal.

Venezuela’s former Ambassador to the UN in Geneva Victor Rodriguez resigned today in protest over the violation of human rights and the loss of the rule of law in the country.

The Ambassador who had been part of the Foreign Service for thirty years said “we are losing the rule of law; we can not accept the violation and lack of respect for human rights. There is an enormous amount of concern because all fundamental rights are being violated, both civil and political rights of Venezuelans”

Venezuela’s Foreign Minister, immediately denied the resignation of the Ambassador, saying that Dr. Rodriguez is not an Ambassador and devotes himself to breeding cows in his farm in France.

We will keep you updated. By the way, the Foreign Minister did not reply to the charges about human rights violations, cows are more surreal.

Representatives from the Primero Justicia party went today to the Attorney General’s/Prosecutors office to denounce the kidnapping and torturing of three of its leaders. According to them, two of their leaders were kidnapped after the Mayor of Baruta, a municipality within Caracas, was ordered captured by the Prosecutors’ office. The two men were missing for two days and they were asked to reveal the whereabouts of Capriles as well as information about other leaders.

The men were kidnapped by eight men in a cab, who presumably belonged to the political police DISIP. Among the tortures used were the spraying strong insecticides inside their mouths, placing bags over their heads, hot pipes under the arms, they were hung from the ceiling; they were rolled inside a mattress and hit them with bats.

The two were released last night.

After listening to lawyers give opinions and criticisms of yesterday’s decision by the Constitutional Hall of the Supreme Court, here is a summary of the conclusions, as well as I can understand them:

–You are guilty until proven innocent: The decision says that the “good faith” principle as it is called in Spanish legalese, does not apply for this particular case. The Court actually says that this and the presumption of innocence (Art. 49) do not apply to “acts of political participation” and that will of those that sign is subject to the “inquisitive competence “of the CNE

–Violates the Constitutional attributes of the Electoral Hall: Article 297 says ““The jurisdiction over electoral matters will be exercised by the Electoral Hall”.

–Violates the principle of no retroactivity: The Constitution say nothing can be retroactive (Art. 24) the Constitutional Hall says the change in the rules never took place, that it was in the original regulations which is absolutely false.

–Violates the equilibrium of the Court: It violates the equilibrium principle that all Halls have the same hierarchy.

–Violates the Constitution on its jurisdiction: The Constitutional hall only has jurisdiction to revise a final decision (Article 336)

You have to wonder if these guys are even lawyers or have read the Constitution!

Minister of Health Roger Capella is once again trying to confuse us, but I will not let him do it, that is what the Devil is here for. So here is the complete explanation, by placing all of you in the right frame of reference to understand it:

Minister Capella may sound confusing, but he is not. It is not easy when you are a medical doctor and spend your whole life removing varicose veins from lady’s legs in an enterprise more akin to a fast food outlet than the medical profession. It is quite lucrative, but you know, one varicose vein looks exactly like the next one, so after a 145,323 legs at 50 bucks a pop, you sort of get frustrated, and you have little purpose in life. It is sooo boring.

Then you are in your fifties, you are a nobody and you meet this charismatic guy who is running for President and you think maybe he can name you Director to some regional health office where you’ll do nothing and collect the salary, while you can hire a nurse to do your job and keep collecting the $25 bucks or is it $50? I forgot. You know beans about politics or health care, but it’s like one step towards retirement and you can make more money.

Then one day you realize that somehow all those competent people that run the Ministry are resigning, you don’t understand it well, and why would they abandon the process, this beautiful revolution? Everything is so cool in the revolution, people say hello to you, they invite you to parties and sometimes they even ask for your opinion. And you love the 18 year old Scotch. Of course, I try to keep quiet, since I know little about what they are asking. The best part however, is that you don’t have to stare at ugly varicose legs and see the blood and all that.

One day you hop on your car because they called you from Caracas, you hope the meeting will be brief, maybe catch a meal at one of those good Caracas Restaurants, before going back. You get to the Ministry; you are flabbergasted; they want me to be Vice-Minister! Imagine, you will have a car, move to Caracas and you will be important. Thanks God there is a Minister, you won’t have to talk to the press about things you know little about, like hospitals or healthcare, they will never ask about varicose veins anyway, which is all you really remember from med school. You don’t care about them; it’s just a way to make a living.

Finally, one fateful and horrendous day, you are having fun, banquet at the Palace and the charismatic guy, who no longer seems like he knows what he is doing, he approaches you and tells you the Minister is leaving, you think the dream is over, you will leave with her, when the President tells you that you are “it”. Like you are the man, the new Minister! Before you can say no, the President turns around and you are “it”, the brand new Minister of Health. Thanks God you have Directors to do the job, since you know little about healthcare. You just hope reporters will not ask too many questions.

Jesus! Here they come again to confuse me, the stupid Director of that Hospital fired a bunch of people for signing against the President and everyone wants to ask questions about why. Then you tell the reporters that if these people worked for the CIA they would be fired, they are terrorists. CIA? Oh shit! I said NASA, not CIA. I don’t even remember what NASA does. I am sure the gringos would fire them anyway.

I wake up early in the morning, the VP is calling asking me why the Hell I said such a stupid thing. He tells me I have to fire them, but not admit that I did it. I actually have to deny it. If we all say that, JV tells me, then it will become the truth. Happens all the time. Just watch, the VP says.

I go out and tell reporters that they misunderstood what I said; your words were taken out of context and tell them that it is those that conspire than cant keep their jobs. Shoot! The VP calls again so you go out, wow! Look how many reporters are here now! I tell them I am a nice guy, they go away, I am not sure what all I said, and this is very confusing.

I go to Maracaibo two days later and that stupid gringo named Shapiro says on the radio that at NASA, or was it the CIA? they would not fire anybody for political reasons. They fire their baseball managers all the time, I am a Mets fan, I know. They expect me to believe this. Glad I am here now, in Maracaibo, nobody knows about what I said in Caracas. It was private anyway.

Oh boy! First thing they ask is about the stupid firings again. How did they find out? This is very confusing, I tell them I will not retract, the terrorists, the violent and the conspirators will indeed be fired. I better switch topics. I start telling them about our good Cuban friends, the Doctors that came to fill the space the stupid Venezuelan Doctors did not want to occupy. I tell them the problem is that there are no General practitioners in Venezuela, so we need to train them. I tell them we need Doctors with mystique. Maybe a Graduate program for GP’s, that sounds good, no?. God, I hope they don’t know about my varicose past. Maybe I should just resign, this is getting more confusing everyday.

Minister of Health Roger Capella is once again trying to confuse us, but I will not let him do it, that is what the Devil is here for. So here is the complete explanation, by placing all of you in the right frame of reference to understand it:

Minister Capella may sound confusing, but he is not. It is not easy when you are a medical doctor and spend your whole life removing varicose veins from lady’s legs in an enterprise more akin to a fast food outlet than the medical profession. It is quite lucrative, but you know, one varicose vein looks exactly like the next one, so after a 145,323 legs at 50 bucks a pop, you sort of get frustrated, and you have little purpose in life. It is sooo boring.

Then you are in your fifties, you are a nobody and you meet this charismatic guy who is running for President and you think maybe he can name you Director to some regional health office where you’ll do nothing and collect the salary, while you can hire a nurse to do your job and keep collecting the $25 bucks or is it $50? I forgot. You know beans about politics or health care, but it’s like one step towards retirement and you can make more money.

Then one day you realize that somehow all those competent people that run the Ministry are resigning, you don’t understand it well, and why would they abandon the process, this beautiful revolution? Everything is so cool in the revolution, people say hello to you, they invite you to parties and sometimes they even ask for your opinion. And you love the 18 year old Scotch. Of course, I try to keep quiet, since I know little about what they are asking. The best part however, is that you don’t have to stare at ugly varicose legs and see the blood and all that.

One day you hop on your car because they called you from Caracas, you hope the meeting will be brief, maybe catch a meal at one of those good Caracas Restaurants, before going back. You get to the Ministry; you are flabbergasted; they want me to be Vice-Minister! Imagine, you will have a car, move to Caracas and you will be important. Thanks God there is a Minister, you won’t have to talk to the press about things you know little about, like hospitals or healthcare, they will never ask about varicose veins anyway, which is all you really remember from med school. You don’t care about them; it’s just a way to make a living.

Finally, one fateful and horrendous day, you are having fun, banquet at the Palace and the charismatic guy, who no longer seems like he knows what he is doing, he approaches you and tells you the Minister is leaving, you think the dream is over, you will leave with her, when the President tells you that you are “it”. Like you are the man, the new Minister! Before you can say no, the President turns around and you are “it”, the brand new Minister of Health. Thanks God you have Directors to do the job, since you know little about healthcare. You just hope reporters will not ask too many questions.

Jesus! Here they come again to confuse me, the stupid Director of that Hospital fired a bunch of people for signing against the President and everyone wants to ask questions about why. Then you tell the reporters that if these people worked for the CIA they would be fired, they are terrorists. CIA? Oh shit! I said NASA, not CIA. I don’t even remember what NASA does. I am sure the gringos would fire them anyway.

I wake up early in the morning, the VP is calling asking me why the Hell I said such a stupid thing. He tells me I have to fire them, but not admit that I did it. I actually have to deny it. If we all say that, JV tells me, then it will become the truth. Happens all the time. Just watch, the VP says.

I go out and tell reporters that they misunderstood what I said; your words were taken out of context and tell them that it is those that conspire than cant keep their jobs. Shoot! The VP calls again so you go out, wow! Look how many reporters are here now! I tell them I am a nice guy, they go away, I am not sure what all I said, and this is very confusing.

I go to Maracaibo two days later and that stupid gringo named Shapiro says on the radio that at NASA, or was it the CIA? they would not fire anybody for political reasons. They fire their baseball managers all the time, I am a Mets fan, I know. They expect me to believe this. Glad I am here now, in Maracaibo, nobody knows about what I said in Caracas. It was private anyway.

Oh boy! First thing they ask is about the stupid firings again. How did they find out? This is very confusing, I tell them I will not retract, the terrorists, the violent and the conspirators will indeed be fired. I better switch topics. I start telling them about our good Cuban friends, the Doctors that came to fill the space the stupid Venezuelan Doctors did not want to occupy. I tell them the problem is that there are no General practitioners in Venezuela, so we need to train them. I tell them we need Doctors with mystique. Maybe a Graduate program for GP’s, that sounds good, no?. God, I hope they don’t know about my varicose past. Maybe I should just resign, this is getting more confusing everyday.