You have to wonder how it all started. Was it in the middle of a boring meeting talking about economic scenarios or Maduro’s sinking popularity (7% down in one month!) that Nicolas himself shouted “Road Trip” and they all left the room and called Raul and borrowed “the” plane and took off for Russia, or was it Nicolas in a thoughtful (sigh!) moment that came up and said: “I know, we can sell half the country to the Chinese for US$ 20 billion” and the “Fantastic Voyage” began.
And you also have to wonder how they felt landing in Moscow on the biggest “puente” day of the year, right before their Christmas day and thinking “Uuups” nobody is around and is so freaking cold, but the Vice-Minister for Foreign Affairs saved the day, they found a cardboard picture of Hugo and a General to take pictures with his iPhone and the trip was on to an auspicious start
At this point Nicolas must have been wondering why he got rid of Rafael, Ramirez at least knew his way around the world. Why go to Russia first when their problems may be as tough as Venezuela’s? They offered to sell us some planes, some tanks,but even Nicolas learned how to say Nyet, the same word they heard all the time from their Russians counterpart. Then Nicolas thought that Jan. 6th. was St. Nicolas day and wanted to celebrate his birthday and the puzzled Russians asked him if his name was Jesus. Puzzled faces…
Time to take the Road Trip to China.
The following is Marcos´s narrative (From his Twitter TL):
Oh! Beijing in January! So freaking cold. It is not the temperature, its the winds. Thanks God Nicolas had the huge scarf made and said he could skip the Wall because he had already been there. The first meeting went well, except for the ending
When Nicolas mentioned US$ 20 billion, the Chinese smiled. An unscrutable smile at that. US$ 20 billion, they said, we would not pay that for all of Mongolia, said one of the Chinese. Nicolas argued back saying Sidor alone was worth US$ 10 billion, to what Ling Pin answered: “Chavez paid US$ 1.97 billion for it when it was functioning and eporting”. As we went out Maduro asked me what that was about and I said: “I did not know that”
We then had a meeting:
No Chinese allowed here, you could only get in if you were a Minister and Merentes, of course, because he came all the way from Naiguata when he was called. We decided here to have lots of meetings. Make it look good in Venezuela.
So, we met with all of China (lots of people). Including the Chinese Oil company, Bank of China, Citic and Sany (below). The last two pictures may look the same, but the Chinese guys are different, we had like ten of these in two hours.It was a long day of work.
In the end, Maduro asked me to make a statement and I did :
I said: “The Chinese trusts us and they want to invest in Venezuela soon”
So, they are coming on Jan. 17th. to see where they want to invest in Venezuela. All wee need, for now, is US$ 20 billion. Maybe 20 more later. Should not be that hard, they seem to have a lot of money, even if they are Communists.
Off we go now, we visit Iran (boring!), Algeria and Saudi Arabia, Nicolas wants to convince them to cut production. I guess he has never talked to them.
It is indeed a Fantastic Voyage, even if Nicolas feels like he is in a Road Trip.
End of report.
The Devil's Excrement 