-“We have to fight regional caudillismos. It hurts a lot, they surround themselves with inconditionals and create personal projects over the hopes of the people”
-“We have to return safety to the streets! It is a life of death commitment!”
-“They (the opposition) are inundated by hate, while we continue with our love. The Kingdom of the heavens on Earth is Socialism”
-“If the opposition reaches power there will be war, that is why we have to guarantee the continuity of the revolutionary process”
-“Starting today the Cuban flag will wave in the Panteón, because Cuba is part of this Nation. We are ready to die fighting for Cuba”
-“If it were not for the attacks. the lies and the exagerations about the errors of the Governmnet, we would have 80% popularity”
-“Why do there have to be potholes in the streets if we export asphalt”
-“In the face of the poisounous message of Gobovision, Prosecutor, President of the Supreme Court, fulfill your obligations and if not, resign!”
Add your own in the comments, I will move it up to the post if it is good.
The Devil's Excrement 
January 6, 2010 at 12:59 pm
During the Bush administration several websites were dedicated to collect and publish every stupid utterance (written, spoken or visual) that “Dubya” produced. I think it is time to create our very own Chavecisms website just for fun. Don’t you agree?
See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bushism
January 2, 2010 at 2:42 am
I am not sure about the date, but this one defies all natural laws:
“7 x 8 = 52”
January 1, 2010 at 2:56 am
“We are not and we will not be in a recession”. “We don’t have banks with no solvency, no bad loans, because, for a long time we are controlling the financial activity, we are paying attention.” (Jan 2009)
“I’d love to do it. Since they (*) insist the debate should be with me, I accept. Tomorrow at 11 am.”
(*)VargasLlosa-Krauze-Castañeda
“If they swear Micheletti in, we will overthrow him”. “I have ordered the armed forces to be on the alert”
“Fidel told me: Tell Ahmadinejad that visiting Venezuela is the same as visiting Cuba, as they are one united nation”
December 31, 2009 at 7:58 pm
Requesting 30 years jail term for judge Alfiuni. What a mongrel!
December 31, 2009 at 1:04 pm
The Three minutes shower was one of the most stupidiest things I ever heard….
December 31, 2009 at 10:17 am
From El Universal, 12/31/09, in end of year message to the country… He noted that in Venezuela prevails a climate “of respect, affection, good wishes and good feelings everywhere.”
December 31, 2009 at 10:09 am
This is a mediocre list, Miguel. You can do better than this.
The “totuma”, the use of lantern in the bathroom, the crazy insults to Colombia and Obama, the insane “provoking rain” comments, the praising of the chacal…and this just out of the top of my head.
December 31, 2009 at 9:54 am
Nice resume of the Chavez Bolivarian stupidity.
Happy new year Miguel.