Things we did NOT hear today

May 31, 2005

Things we did NOT hear today:

Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court Rehnquist: “Now that I wanted to go to Margarita, I might not be able to get a visa”


MVR Deputy Iris Varela: “I think Maria Corina and George looked very good together”


US State Department: We will extradite Posada Carriles even if these guys gave us no documentation”


Fidel Castro: “If the US sends Posada Carriles to Venezuela, I will extradite Shakur to the US, even if they send me no documentation”


Venezuelan Chief Justice Mora: “If I don’t get a visa, who will go with my kids to Disneyworld this summer”


Maria Corina Machado: “This guy is really weird and he made a pass”


Hugo Chavez: “I never said I wanted to break relations with the us”. Uups, sorry we did hear that


Minister of Oil Ramirez: “I prefer to work with the Chinese and the Brazilians rather than the Americans, they are all about goodwill, they don’t care about profits”


Miss Venezuela and Miss Universe contestant Monica Spear: “Jeez, they rebuilt my body, but forgot to rebuild my brain”


VP Jose Vicente Rangel: “You could never even come close to imagine what a mess PDVSA is in”


Primero Justicia Julio Borges: “They picked me, because the other guys were doing a very good job as Mayors, I was expendable”


MVR Deputy Nicolas Maduro: “I wish Maria Corina was my girlfriend, Celia is just too loud”


COPEI President: “We were going to have a meeting of the party, but nobody came”


MAS President: “We had a meeting of the party, but nobody came”


MVR President: “We don’t have meetings of the party, Chavez may come”


French President Jacques Chirac: “Merde!”


Hugo Chavez: ” I was not missing, I was misplaced”

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